Thursday, 20 September 2007

United in respect on the fringe

Part of joy of Family gathering is fringe discussions, which often showpiece more interesting ideas and techniques than main event. Today I host discussion between two old friends from Euroenforcer days, Signor 'BabyDon' Clegg and Signor 'Carbonator' Huhne. The topic is "Respect, what I like best about my paesano"

Carbonator start:

"What I like best about my good friend Signor Clegg is his courage. Personally I wouldn't have announced to a room full of Sicilians that I wanted to open the United Territories to waves of immigrants after their jobs and homes. But I salute his bravery in doing so. It shows true commitment to courting unpopularity for the Family in an era of flim-flam merchants chasing the easy score."

"Grazie Signor," say BabyDon "what I like best about my eccellente and loyal friend Capo Huhne is his vision. His notion, for example, that we should put the squeeze on all forms of motor transport by 2040 goes far beyond suggestions made by more modest and cautious men of honour. His thinking is so far ahead of more ordinary and humble citizens that in less enlightened times he might have been referred to as a mystic or seer. So much more refreshing than the easy reassurance of the popular."

"My colleague is too kind," say Carbonator "and it reminds me of another one of his qualities, his ability to adopt many of the mannerisms of our opponents, old Don Blair and Hollywood Don Cameron. Some might have looked at these superficial fly-by-night opportunists with disdain. But my friend sees aspects of their characters that he much admires. It is a tribute to his adaptability."

"My life-long amico is of course correct" repost BabyDon "learning from your enemies and an interest in winning are two of my interests. I on the other hand admire his traditionalism and appeal to Moustache Petes who have been fighting for the Family in the same way since the 1970s without ever seeing the need to adopt the tactics and techniques of larger more successful Families. It gives him a real homely appeal."

"It is of course good of my esteemed and respected collaboratore to highlight his association with the much admired 'right-on' wing of the Family." comment Carbonator "While many would shy away from the ideas espoused by his former employer Conservatori Commissar Leon Brittain, he does not flinch from that controversy. It is most refreshing."

"It is equally refreshing of my admired and eminent accomplice to have reinvented himself as a champion of the 'left-behinds'," add BabyDon. "Some would have said his seven homes, former career exploiting bankers, and application of market-stall solutions to traditional forms of violence against the vulnerable would have made him naturally right-on. However that former Labouristi, kicked out for having views too 'committed' for that Family, are flocking to his banner, is a source of pride for all of us. I will have no hesitation in labelling this movement the new Huhney Left as a token of my deep respect."

At that moment Signora Campbell enter the room

"The Don would like to see you both..." she say acidly "... now... he has some matters of respect to discuss."

I sure glad my fringe theme already influencing highest ranks of Family. BabyDon and Carbonator and get up and start walking out. Crowded room though, so it hard for them to avoid feet connecting with each other shins as they leave. Don Campbell is lucky to have such articulate men of honour in a hurry to see him.


Anonymous said...

Don Liberali,

the award brought me to your diary and I see that my suspicions regarding the "family" were true all along.

I was recruited by Don Rogerson to the firm and have been working in the Sardinian-esque area of the family-land ever since.

The firm here is strong but ageing quickly - young blood needed (preferably still being pumped around young bodies).

Anonymous said...

On reflection perhaps that should be Signor Rogerson ...